June 16th, 2026

Play It Again: The Soundtrack of Life

By Staci Makela-Kerr, LPC Associate
Transform & Renew Counseling | San Antonio, Texas

Music has a lasting place in our lives.

Parents sing lullabies to soothe fussy babies. We use songs to learn our ABCs, remember how to spell difficult words, and memorize information long before we realize we are learning. Music follows us through childhood, adolescence, adulthood, and often remains meaningful even in our final years.

It becomes the soundtrack of our lives.

We use music to celebrate milestones, process heartbreak, remember loved ones, and connect with one another. Certain songs can transport us back to moments we thought we had forgotten. A familiar melody can bring back emotions, memories, and experiences in an instant.

I still cry whenever I hear Tim McGraw sing Live Like You Were Dying, the song my dad chose for his celebration of life. Every time I hear it, I am reminded not only of losing him, but also of how he lived—and how I hope to live.

Music has a way of helping us remember who we are, where we have been, and what has mattered most.

Music can connect us to memories, relationships, grief, joy, and healing.

Why Music Feels So Powerful

Have you ever heard a song and immediately been transported back to a specific moment in your life?

Maybe it was your wedding song. Your high school graduation. Your first heartbreak. Your first kiss.

Research continues to show that music is closely connected to autobiographical memory, meaning songs can help us access personal experiences and emotions from our past. A familiar song often acts as a doorway to memories that may have been sitting quietly in the background for years.

For many people, hearing a meaningful song does not simply remind them of a memory. It helps them re-experience the emotions connected to it.

That connection is part of what makes music such a powerful tool for emotional well-being.

Music, Identity, and Growing Up

Researchers have found that adolescence is a particularly important time for music and identity development.

The music we listen to during our teenage years often becomes deeply connected to who we are, how we see ourselves, and the memories we carry into adulthood.

My parents listened to classic country music. Loretta Lynn, Jim Reeves, and of course Dolly Parton were regular fixtures in our house.

As a teenager, I gravitated toward Talking Heads, Duran Duran, and INXS. Decades later, I am still listening to many of those same artists.

What surprises me now is that my sons know many of those songs, too.

By sharing the soundtrack of my youth with them, I also created opportunities for them to share theirs with me.

To this day, I cannot walk into the gym without Green Day playing through my earbuds—thanks to my children. Somehow, it still makes an hour-long workout feel like ten minutes.

Music creates connections between generations in ways we often do not realize.

Music, Memory, and Dementia

One of my favorite memories comes from working in skilled nursing facilities.

Birthday celebrations could become surprisingly lively events. There was cake, punch, laughter, and of course music.

I loved watching residents who were typically quiet and withdrawn suddenly begin tapping their feet, singing lyrics, and smiling as familiar songs filled the room.

They may not have been physically able to get up and dance to The Twist, but mentally they were right back there.

Those moments were powerful.

Research suggests that music can activate memory networks even when other cognitive abilities have declined. For individuals living with dementia or Alzheimer’s disease, familiar music can improve mood, reduce agitation, encourage communication, and create meaningful social connections.

If you care for someone living with dementia, try playing music from their younger years.

You may be surprised by what comes back.

Sometimes a song opens a door that words cannot.

Music and Mental Health

Music is not just entertainment.

It can influence mood, stress levels, emotional regulation, and overall well-being.

Many people naturally use music to cope with difficult emotions without even realizing it.

We create playlists for workouts. We listen to calming music before bed. We turn on favorite songs after a difficult day. We play meaningful music during celebrations, road trips, and gatherings with friends.

Music can help us process grief, connect with others, regulate emotions, and create moments of comfort during stressful seasons of life.

While music is not a replacement for counseling or mental health treatment, it can be a valuable part of self-care and emotional wellness.

Sometimes healing happens through conversation. Sometimes healing happens through connection. And sometimes healing begins with a song that reminds us who we are.

Music as a Form of Everyday Self-Care

One of the reasons I appreciate music so much is that it is one of the most accessible forms of self-care available to us.

You do not need special equipment, extensive training, or even a lot of time.

Sometimes self-care looks like putting on your favorite song while making dinner.

Sometimes it is turning on calming music during your morning routine.

Sometimes it is rolling down the windows and singing at the top of your lungs during a long drive home.

Music gives us permission to pause for a moment and reconnect with ourselves.

In a world that often feels rushed and demanding, those moments matter.

What Would Your Soundtrack Be?

When I was younger, I never understood why Olympic athletes cried when they heard the Star-Spangled Banner.

As a child, it just sounded like a song.

As an adult, I understand something different.

The years of sacrifice. The obstacles overcome. The joy of reaching a goal that once felt impossible. The desire to freeze a meaningful moment in time.

Music often becomes attached to our most important experiences because emotions help strengthen memories.

When you think about your own life, what moments would you want to hold onto forever?

What songs would be playing?

Creating a Playlist for the Season You Are In

We often think about music as a way to remember the past, but it can also help support us in the present.

Consider creating a playlist based on the season of life you are currently navigating.

You might create:

✓ A playlist that helps you feel calm during stressful days

✓ A playlist that motivates you when your energy is low

✓ A playlist filled with songs that remind you of people you love

✓ A playlist that helps you process grief or major life changes

✓ A playlist that simply makes you smile

There is no right or wrong way to do it.

The goal is not creating the perfect playlist. The goal is creating intentional moments that support your emotional well-being.

A Simple Reflection Exercise

Ask yourself:

• What memories does this bring up?

• What emotions am I noticing?

• Why does this song matter to me?

• Who does this song remind me of?

• What season of life does it represent?

You may discover that music has been helping tell your story all along.

Creating Your Own Life Playlist

Think About Your Life's Soundtrack

One activity I often recommend is creating a personal soundtrack of your life.

Consider the songs connected to meaningful moments such as:

Your first kiss

Graduation

A meaningful friendship

Falling in love

Becoming a parent

A major accomplishment

The loss of a loved one

For me, those songs include:

Staci's Life Playlist

My First Kiss
Time After Time — Cyndi Lauper

High School Graduation
We Didn't Start the Fire — Billy Joel

Wedding
Love Can Build a Bridge — The Judds

Birth of My Twins
Circle of Life — The Lion King Soundtrack

Dad's Celebration of Life
Live Like You Were Dying — Tim McGraw

What would your list include?

Pull out an old mixed tape. Open an old playlist. Share songs with your children, friends, or loved ones.

Ask about the soundtrack of their lives.

You might be surprised by the stories that emerge.

Counseling in San Antonio, Texas

At Transform & Renew Counseling, we believe healing often happens through connection, reflection, and understanding our own stories.

Whether those stories are shared through conversation, memories, relationships, or even music, exploring what has shaped us can create meaningful opportunities for growth and healing.

If you are struggling with anxiety, grief, life transitions, depression, or simply feeling disconnected from yourself, counseling can provide a space to explore your experiences and move toward healing.

Schedule Your First Session Meet Staci

Frequently Asked Questions About Music and Mental Health

Can music support mental health?

Music can support emotional well-being by helping people regulate mood, process memories, reduce stress, and connect with meaningful experiences. Music is not a replacement for counseling, but it can be a helpful self-care tool.

Why do certain songs bring back strong memories?

Music is closely connected to autobiographical memory. A familiar song can bring back memories, emotions, people, places, and seasons of life because music often becomes attached to meaningful experiences.

Can music help with grief?

Music can help people remember loved ones, process emotions, and feel connected to meaningful moments. For some people, certain songs become part of how they honor, remember, and grieve someone they love.

How can I use music as self-care?

You can use music as self-care by creating playlists for calm, motivation, grief, reflection, or joy. You can also use music during routines, walks, workouts, journaling, or quiet moments of emotional reflection.

Can counseling help me process memories connected to grief or life transitions?

Yes. Counseling can provide a supportive space to process memories, grief, identity changes, life transitions, and emotional experiences that may feel difficult to carry alone.